Friday, August 8, 2014

Super Superficial: A Tale of Online Dating

I joined an online dating site. I'm not so sure about it. The real problem is that there are -7 single Mormon men in my area. There are other LDS guys in the state of Florida, but nobody is floating my boat.

I'm going to come out and say it. I'm superficial. At least at first. I have a very specific type. I like dark blond hair, blue eyes, and a little height. I like big biceps and abs and rounded butts. (Tina knows what I'm talking about.) I also like boys who venture out in the woods or take a swim at the beach in the middle of a storm. Who can fix things and look good while mowing the lawn. I need someone who would go ghost hunting and fishing with me. Someone who can swing an ax or command a surfboard or wield a hammer. I need someone who won't lie or cheat. I need someone who has a good work ethic, but not a workaholic. I need a man who will accept me the way I am, and someone who will love my boys. I like things besides biceps. I find brains and bravery very sexy. And if you've read poetry or fallen in love with a book in the last few years. Have mercy.

But all I find on the LDS dating sites are guys like these. And weirdos.

 



I feel bad when I click No, No, No, on my daily matches. I'm not perfect and I don't want people judging me by only by looks because I'm no super model. But this time I have to be attracted to my mate. Last time, the attraction was pretty forced. I need someone I can't keep my hands off of. I need a lot of things, and I'm scared I won't get them. It all makes me want to retreat into my yoga pants and date Netflix for life. I don't even know why I'm trying online dating. I'm not into chasing guys, and I don't talk back to anyone who contacts me. Maybe I'm just a big scaredy cat.


Do any men read this blog? Do I stand a chance in today's dating market? Would you want to date me? Do guys really pick a girl based on her personality? I don't have blond hair and stick-thin, spider-like legs. I was blessed with boobs, and muscles, and curves. I also have wrinkles on my forehead and dark under eye circles that make me look a little bit like I was punched. (I wear makeup to cover this up) I have a lot of opinions. I have a sugar addiction. I hate working out, but think it's important for everyone to do. I have sass and a sense of humor. But is that enough? Do guys have these types of insecurities? Am I alone in my neurotic self-assessment?


So now I've signed up for the free 7 day trial on another, non-Mormon dating site, and let me tell you, all the hot guys are over there. And they are talking to me and I'm scared of them. I think everyone is a Catfish and probably going to dismember me if I meet them for dinner. I just don't like the whole getting-to-know-you-over-the-internet thing. I need references and background checks and a guarantee that you won't murder in the bathroom of the local Chili's.

I used to be really good with guys. I had a giant map on my bedroom wall at college. I used it to mark the state's where the boys I kissed were from. I aimed to get all fifty states. I got most of the states (Alaska I was the most proud of), but I had a lot of fun. Like this one time I met a guy who I swear to you could have been a model. I told him I thought he was cute, and that was that. I got another pin in my map. I used to know how to flirt, but now I mainly know how to stutter and spill my drink.

Maybe it's time I turn to my internet to find a date. Does this make me desperate? I don't know, and I'm done caring. I am a badass single mother, a teacher, a tutor, a cheerleading coach, and an author. I don't have time to find guys on my own. I can't hang out at coffee shops or go to the bar or dance at a club. I need help. I'm not saying I want to get married again. I just want to go on a date, hold someone's hand, and get a good night kiss. I'm so out of practice. Does anyone know a hot, single, nonmurderer guy out there that they think I'd hit it off with? Am I sounding desperate again? Whatever. If I never put myself out there again, I'll never make out again. And I really, really miss making out. Really. 





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