First Drafts

 

Pardon the swearing, but if you know me, you know I like cussing every once in a while. It's good for my soul. Ernest Hemingway knows what he's talking about. First drafts always suck, but they must be done. Otherwise your book will never get written.

Do you ever think your writing, art, crafting, music, or whatever you're passion is a waste of time? I get that way often. Like right this second, I want to give up writing. It's taking me soooooooooooooo long to get this far, but at least I have an awesome agent and a book with publishers. But it feels like I'm never going to get published. My books will just remain locked in my laptop, hidden from the world.

For some reason, I decided to start working again on my NaNoWriMo (National Write a Novel Month) book again. By working on it, I mean realizing what a piece of crap it is. But at least it's getting done. The scariest part of a new book is starting the first page. I think that's what I like best about writing. I know the ending, but have no idea how to get there. Somewhere amongst the drafts and edits, is a good story, with heartache and pain, but also with joy and laughter. There's a hard beginning, a messy middle, and a happy ending. You read to escape reality, don't you? I like happy endings. I hate when the endings are sad. I'm looking at you, Ernest Hemingway! The ending to Farewell to Arms ruined me. Did you see Silver lings Play Book? Bradly Cooper's reaction to the book was perfect. You're so invested in the characters and the story, and when it ends the way it does you want to throw that F-ing book out the window because you're so mad.

I might be a romantic, but I think all ending should be happy in books, not overly sappy, but with closure and the protagonist getting what they want. Because in life, we don't usually get what we want. We get let down, we cry, we build our lives back up, but in the very end, the crap we went through was what was necessary to get us to where we need to be.

My new life is like a first draft. I have no idea what I'm doing, but in the end I will be happy and the ending will be good, much better than the other ending I was headed for. I will make mistakes, I will rewrite entire chapters, but this life will be better.